Fairly comfortable in the closet
I never have been one to tell many people about my struggle. I think there are several reasons for this. There are members of my family who couldn't get past it, there are people at work who couldn't get past it, and there is the possiblity that it would hurt or limit me professionally. Because of these, it hs become habit to keep it in and I don't tell too many friends. Consequently, I only tell people I know I can trust. I would like to be able to be more open about it, but am not willing to risk the fallout and strain on relationships. I guess you could say I am still pretty well closeted.
Not being able to talk about it doesn't make it any easier, which one of the reasons I joined an Evergreen support group. It's also one of the reasons I started this blog. I enjoy getting comments from people with their thoughts, and I enjoy reading other blogs and hearing about what it's like for others. I actually take some support from that.
So, thanks!
posted by LDSwithSSA at Sunday, January 29, 2006
2 Comments:
I totally understand. I know what you mean about feeling like you have to be closeted. Sometimes I feel like life would be a lot easier if I could just come out and tell people that I am gay so that it would be out of the way. But it is hard feeling like I am always holding something back from those around me.
7:13 AM
You described in this post one of the reasons I am no longer active in the LDS church, because I don't think i should have to hide. There is a stigma associated with being gay, or "struggling with SSA," that I believe is wrong. This stigma is fostered and strengthened by the hush hush kind of treatment it receives in the LDS church and throughout much of our society.
I don't believe any hardship or struggle or confusion can truly be overcome without complete and open honesty, within ourselves, as well as in the environment that we exist.
1:42 PM
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